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All My Life

It was not so long ago 
when I thought I’d never meet someone like you. 
Wrong was I, thinking I’m in control 
Believing I’d never fall.

All my life I thought no one would 
melt a heart like mine, a heart so cold, 
a heart hardened by the past, 
protected by shields so vast.

Slowly I was falling 
without even knowing. 
Only to find out too late 
I have no choice but to accept my fate.

I could dream, I suppose 
forever, I could hope 
there will never be any ‘us’, that’s our destiny 
so I wake up to reality.

I lied when I said 
I didn’t love you, 
that my feelings for you 
are through.

I lied 
not because I wanted to 
but because I love you 
and I still do.

I wouldn’t do a thing to hurt you 
but I just have to let go. 
I can’t hold on much longer 
‘coz for us there’s no forever.

When It Rains

Rain drops falling in my head,
and never knowing when it will end.
Should I run for cover,
or let another rain drop fall in my head again?
I would love to dance in the rain,
and knowing somehow it’ll help erase the pain.
Sometimes when I’m all alone,
and I see rain drops are falling outside again.
There’s happiness that I feel because rain is here once again.
Some may feels gloomy when it rains
and some just want to feel it in their hand.
But me I just love it when rain drops falls into my face.
Oh the magic that rain brings, it makes you feel unique.
It may bring you sadness, wet feeling in toes and clothes
but I just see happiness when it rains.

What they don’t see

If only they knew how hard it is for me…

am turning 18 and the world I begin to see..

my friends begin to change right in front of my eyes

and now hey seem to laugh and tell all sorts of lies,

they hang around in groups of three or fourthe language they use….. is not gentle anymore…

the kids that seem the most lonely wind up in their pack

and those that stand alone talk behind their back…

those that step to their own beat don’t seem to be taken norm.

I’ve watched a few just fade away to drugs and alcohol…

and many more have given up, too many to recall…

alcohol is an option for anyone in my school,

I’ve lost a friend to booze and i shall not be a fool…

if only I can make a difference, what can I do or say???

I go on each and everyday and try my best…

there is one thing I would like to do before I graduate,

i’d like to touch them all, one by one… before its too late…

Falling apart

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I cried all night until morning came.

i’ll surely find the strength to start walking.

i guess the sun has risen to conceal my heart

because soon the darkness will certainly grow bright.

truly everyone wants to grant a wish but sometimes

it doesn’t go the way you want.

if i collect fragments of hope in the palm of my hand,

i can change them into wonderful joy.

My friends and loved ones give me courage

and i’m holding tight to those words

but the final answerone i must find by myself.

continuing forth for tomorrow.

my feelings are undefeated by the rainand passes through the flame.

i want to persist that strongly

and so someday

even when it seems everything is falling apart.

The color of Pain

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If ever the weep of silence
That echoes inside my heart
You have heard,
If ever you have known
The loneliness that accompanies me,

If ever the color of pain
That tinges my tears crystal
You have seen,
If ever you have felt
How emptiness fills my heart –

Ask sky,
Ask sky what it feels to love!

Trying to speak My heart. . .

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Days Pass By Somehow..

But Nights Now Are A Wagon Of Pain.

Injuries May Heal With Time..

But Marks Will Always Remain.

Restless On My Comfortable Bed..

I Toss n Turn n Try To Sleep.

But Thoughts Are Bulking My Head..

And Have Formed A Huge Heap.

The Past Is Flashing Its Scorching Light Beams..

Tearing Me Apart…Breaking Me At The Seams.

The Darkness Of My Life Is More Visible In The Dark..

And Now I’m Trying To Give It A Voice…

Trying To Speak My Heart!

The darkness. . .

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The only thing I can see through the window is thick rain drops piercing down on my conscious.

I stay in the middle of my bed curled up and trying to shield myself from the unknown.

I feel like it is never going to shine and never going to stop raining.

The night seems restless and everlasting.

A loud Roar of wind comes crashing down on my window.

I feel that it’s trying to get inside and take me away.

Why can’t this night end soon?!

I’m utterly alone in confining myself to this prison called home.

I’m in solitude that has despair written all around it.

There’s no where else to turn.

Desperate for this night to be over.

I’m daring the sun to come out,

But it doesn’t.

My ears catch every rain drop that falls, while my eyes are blinded shut by darkness.

I stay curled in my fragile state, wishing for this dreadful night to end.

There’s no peaked window that is not surrounded by the pitch black darkness of the night.

There’s no opening of light to which my skin feels warmth.

There’s no crystal clear view, only the solitary confinement which I’m in.

I have nothing else to do but sit and wait.

Quietly crunched in my bed, waiting for darkness to fade into the sunlight.

I will wait!

Trying to contain my thoughts in silence.

I must simply wait…..In hopes that I will not fade within the darkness.